18-year-old gives doll to 7-year-old she babysits for her birthday, mom reprimands her and takes it away: 'She said I should think before I do things'

Author image for Ally Perry
Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Jan 18, 2026 9:00 AM EST

Looking after somebody else's kids can be a minefield.

While being a babysitter is undeniably an easier thing to do than being a parent, it can involve a lot of work in terms of catering to the beliefs, wishes, and whims of those who are employing you. Some parents have a tendency to be unreliable, cancelling at the last minute or staying out far longer than they promised; others have a strict list of rules for you and their kids that they will punish you for deviating from. 

Essentially, it encompasses all the downsides of any customer service job, along with the challenges that come with caring for children. Some would argue that the adults are more difficult to deal with than the kids, simply because of the expectations that they have. 

When paying somebody for childcare, it is important to communicate clearly about what you want. Otherwise, it is more than likely that some misunderstandings will occur. While a few of these may only be small transgressions that are not going to do any harm, others may be more serious. For any conscientious babysitter, upsetting children or their parents is the last thing they would ever want to do.

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • a young woman looks at a little girl sat on a kitchen counter with a baby doll laid in front of her
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • In this story, a teenager who babysat for a living was nonplussed when the mom of a 7-year-old girl she took care of reprimanded her for what she thought was normal behavior. She asked her to babysit at the last minute, and while the babysitter was looking at the intake form she had filled out, she realized it was the girl's birthday.

    As a result, she decided to bring the child a doll as a gift. She was pleased with the present and was playing with it when her mom came back home. However, the mom was upset at what she saw, taking away the doll immediately and telling the babysitter to never do something like that again.

    The woman later explained that she never wanted her to do anything related to celebrations and holidays with her daughter, and also withheld payment for the babysitting shift. The babysitter was left wondering if she was in the wrong.

  • Am I wrong for getting a kid I babysit a birthday present?

    I (18F) have been babysitting a girl (7F) for like 6 months now. Very sweet kid.
    via Narrow_Mecicine_7283
  • I have a form I require all parents I babysit for to fill out with general information like emergency contacts, health issues I may need to know about,allergies etc.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • As well as their date of birth. A few weeks ago I was contacted by the mother of the girl asking if I could babysit today.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • I agreed I had lost the sheet I keep of the emergency numbers for her specifically so went onto the document to write them down I then saw it was going to be her birthday on the day I babysat her.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • I thought it would be a nice suprise to get her a little birthday gift. I got her a cute little doll.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • When I picked her up from school I gave it to her. She asked if it's because it's her birthday.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • I said yes happy birthday. Looking back she didn't have a very big reaction but I didn't really notice at the time some people just don't have big reactions to things and I don't overthink peoples reactions.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • When we arrived at her house she played with the doll and I got her a snack and put on the Tv for her.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • After a few hours her mother returned home and asked where the doll came from. The daughter said I gave it to her.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • I said yes just a little something because I noticed it was her birthday. The mother was really upset and I was confused by her reaction.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • She took the doll off of the kid and said they don't celebrate birthdays. I felt so bad.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • I didn't even realise people don't celebrate birthdays. She told me to take the doll back so I did.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • She said to never do something like that again or she'll have to find a different babysitter.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • I told her of course and to send me a list of rules and I'll promise to stick to them from now on.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • She messaged me saying not to do anything related to Christmas, New Years, Halloween, Birthdays anything celebratory like that.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • I said of course no worries. She then called me saying she knows I didn't know but in any circumstance it would be inappropriate to get a kid a birthday present without even consulting the parent.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • And it's weird of me to do. I again apologised saying I promise I didn't mean to upset them or go against their values.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • But she said I did anyway though and how would I like it if I had a kid and someone completely violated my trust by going against my way of life.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • I said I would hate that. And she said I should think before I do things.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • I said I definitely will in future. She hasn't yet paid me she usually pays right after I leave.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • Is it a common thing not to celebrate these things? I never knew people didn't celebrate birthday.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • I knew about holidays but birthdays I had no clue.
    via Narrow_Medicine_7283
  • a young woman hugs a little girl who is stood on the kitchen counter in front of her
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • WonderingMe It's not common, and at your age I certainly wouldn't expect you to know. It's standard among Jehovah's Witnesses, not sure who else. You sound like a very kind and responsible person. And you should definitely ensure you get paid for your time.
    via W0nderingMe
  • Oddball_Onyx It might've been helpful for them to include that they're (I'm assuming) Jehovah's Witnesses so this didn't happen. Not celebrating these things is in the minority. Nta I would also ask the parents if it's okay first it just so you don't step on anybody's toes. Because some people can't afford to get their kids stuff and if the babysitter out does them then it gets weird
    via Oddball_Onyx
  • Wen60s Seems to me the mom should have told you that in the beginning. How on earth would you know? Like what if you wore a Christmas sweater in December? If it's that big a deal, she should have told you in the first place.
    via Wen60s
  • panda_cupcake NTA. What you did was a kind, simple gesture. The vast majority of families would not take issue with their regular babysitter offering their child a small gift. I strongly suspect this particular family are Jehovah's Witnesses, who do not celebrate any birthdays or holidays. However, without the mother telling you, you had no reason to know. You are unlikely to be the first or the last to draw this mother's ire for wishing this poor child a happy birthday.
    via panda_cupcake
  • Cosmicshimmer NTA. They are in the minority. My childminder used to give mine little gifts on birthdays and holidays and would have a little tea party for them. They sound like jehovahs witnesses, which is something they should have told you. It's not weird to buy a little kid you know, a birthday gift.
    via Cosmicshimmer
  • Background_Weird2208 Probably a Jehovah's Witness. There was no reason to be rude about it though, most people celebrate birthdays and holidays. And to make the kid give it back is kinda shitty. Next time, ask just in case, if it's okay to bring a gift lest you're babysitting for a religious nut. You are NTA. Make sure she pays you.
    via Background_Weird2208
  • Aggressive_Fly_8377 You're NTA, there's something weird going on there ●●
    via Aggressive_Fly_8377
  • 11Turnips You're normal. It's that mom that's weird. I've only encountered one family like that in 78 years, is how weird she is and how normal you are. Most people - the "norm" - would think that was a really sweet and thoughtful gesture. Anyway just follow their odd behavior rules as it isn't causing actual harm and rest assured you are NTA. PS. I just read down the page and yes, that one family were Jehovah's Witnesses. The reason they said is that, in the Bible, Delilah for her birthday aske
    via 11Turnips
  • protectionspell NTAH at all and please get that woman to pay you !!!!
    via pr0tectionspell

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

babysitter doll gift kids birthday parenting babysitting daughter mom
Scroll Down For The Next Article